First and Lost Love
by Iruka-Yuywell
Summary: They had a love that should have transended time. What went wrong?
1. Life Without You

Disclaimer: I don't own YGO…maybe a small piece of the Tristan/Joey relationship in one tiny universe, but other than that natta. I also don't own Tell Me Where You Are by Ago. _lyrics_

Tristan's POV for those who can't tell.

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**Life Without You**

Another long day of slaving away in an office cubicle, and what do my eyes have to catch as I walk in the door? The picture of you and me on the mantle. How long has it been since that happy day we spent in Tahiti? Ten…Fifteen years? We were so young and carefree…or at least we liked to think so.

_Life without you_

_is just right,_

_can't you see?_

We always said it would be forever. First in our friendship, kicking butts and taking names. Then in our love, standing up to our parents and the world. Guess forever's not as long as we thought. It seems to be far past.

_I feel fine_

_since you're gone,_

_should I say disappeared_

Don't think you hurt me when you walked out that door and never came back. I drove you away. It must have been for your own good…our own good. I've gone on fine. I proved I didn't need you. See? Those are not tear tracks. I just got dust in my eyes again. I really need to clean this place up.

_I kept holding all my tears_

_since I saw you for the last time_

I haven't cried and I'm not going to. It would have done no good. I wasn't good enough for you. You needed the adventures that a life on the road could bring you. I would have just held you down. I hope you know that. We both know how the world felt about us…and maybe they were right…

_I've been through another year_

_I must say that I am stronger..._

And maybe you would have held me down as well. With you gone, my grades shot up, I finished college, and now have a great desk job at Kaiba Corp. I'm an accountant. Suit, tie, briefcase and all. It ain't flashy, but I'm happy. Right?

_But tell me where you are,_

_where you're sleeping at night,_

_tell me who do you love now,_

_who do you miss now?_

So if I'm so happy, why do I toss and turn in a cold, empty bed every night? Why do I still wake up every morning expecting you to be there?

Why can't I move on? I imagine you have. With your charms, you probably have someone in every place you go. I bet you've never alone unless you want to be.

_Tell me what you see_

_when you're closing your eyes_

_If you ever remember_

_when I was by your side._

And I bet you never even think of me. I was just your first love, right? That warm little childhood thing you never think of ever again.

We had so much…Joey…Love…Why did you never come back to me?

_when I was by your side_

TBC…


	2. Am I?

Disclaimer: Still own no more that I did in the last chapter. Especially Am I On Your Mind by Oxygen. _lyrics_

Joey's POV._

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_

**Am I?**

Looking out at Domino for the city limits, I gotta wonder why I stayed away so long. This is and has always been home to me. I shouldn't have run. Now I have 'ta wonder if I'm welcome back.

_I'm searchin' my soul tonight  
It's breakin' my heart  
__I'm wearin' this mask tonight  
But I'm falling apart_

Gunning the engine on my bike, I have to think of you. I always do. It seems to purr your name to me. You taught me how to ride one of these things. Then you taught me how to drive it. With every dip and turn, I can still hear your voice in my ear, telling me just what to do. I wish it were more than a memory.

_Am I somewhere in the corners of your mind?  
Do you see me when you close your eyes at night?_

I miss you, ya know. Not just your steady voice guiding me from the back of a motorcycle. The way just holding your hand sent sparks up my arm. The thrill of kicking the crap out of bunch of guys in a back ally together. The way your smile could make everything right, no matter what. I miss it all.

Especially sleeping next to you. I don't think I've had a truly restful sleep since the day I stormed out on you…

_I will love you 'till the sun no longer shines  
Am I far away or am I on your mind?_

Gods Tris! Why did I run away? Why did my stinking pride keep me away so long? I love you! I've admitted it so many times, so why did I run? If I walked up to your door right now, would you even think of taking me back?

You've got to hate me by now.

_Am I on your mind?  
Am I on your mind?_

Guess I'll find out soon, won't I?

_I'm searchin' my soul tonight  
I'm down on my knees  
I'm tryin' to get myself together  
I'm tryin' to breathe_

When I called your Mom to find out where you're living, I shouldn't have been surprised she didn't want to talk to me. I must'a hurt you pretty bad. Took me almost forever to wiggle out your address. I haven't been yelled at like that since…well since your Dad, rest his forgiving soul, first found out about the, advancement, of our relationship.

I know I deserved everything she said. I just hope…a lot of things tonight.

_Am I somewhere in the corners of your mind?  
Do you see me when you close your eyes at night?_

Pulling up to your apartment complex, and I'm having second thoughts. What if I'm making a mistake? What if you really do hate me? I've finally mustered the courage to come back. I don't know if I could take seeing hatred in those beautiful browns. Gods, I'm an idiot…

_I will love you till the sun no longer shines  
Am I far away or am I on your mind?_

I go to turn around and realize I'm already standing outside your door. I could still turn back. You'd never know I was even here. You'd never have to see my…

And then the door opens.

_Am I on your mind?_

TBC…

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A.N.: I may not be able to post the last chapter to this on If I can, I will. Otherwise it'll be up everywhere else I post. Including Well if things go as planned… Just check my posting LJ (FaithLebeau) 


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